I am a student at Tawa Intermediate School in Wellington, New Zealand. I am in Room 15 and a member of the amazing Huia Syndicate. My teacher is Stephanie Thompson.

Monday, 8 April 2013

A hot and cold day

Once upon a time the sun was beaming down on my sweating face.
Every day my face was close to melting to the ground.
But one day a gush of shivering wind hit my sweating face and body.
Because of that a small white flake made of ice fell right on the tip of my nose.
Because of that it started to rain with small white flakes made of ice witch refreshed me because I wasn't sweating and it felt great.
Because of that I started to sneeze and cough I was freezing and shivering
Until finally it stopped and the beaming sun came out
Ever since then it was hot and cold everyday
The moral of this story is be prepared for the weather.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Ethan
    What a great story. You have really nailed the learning intention of show, not tell by not using the words hot and cold until the very end. I think you have used some fantastic vocabulary in your too.

    Awesome work. Keep it up!

    Stephanie

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting on my Blog. I appreciate comments that can help me improve my learning.